Ignorance&Bliss

Afraid? No
Tuesday, October 27, 2015



I have no ecstatic mood for tomorrow. None. Maybe it hasn't come to me just yet. But the point is, still, i have zero level of excitement.
((but i am excited to blog about it though, does that contradict my statement though))

 The whole batch is currently on their way to Sekolah Sukan Tunku Mahkota Ismail in Bandar Penawar, Kota Tinggi. So that leaves me, Nashwa and Qilah, being the ONLY form threes at school. This isnt the first time of me being left out in school but i think i have never felt this lonely ever in my life ( ok not really i have felt lonelier before actually). We are currently at our Mufaz, doing absolutely nothing really. Nashwa and Qilah are sleeping so i decided to write this post instead.

 I woke up to a loud thunder this morning. I wasn't really scared of lightning and thunder and storms and such and i loved the rain; but this time the rain felt monstrous. Not in literal terms though. The chilly atmosphere urged me to continue sleeping, then i remembered i had school today. And this would be the last night i'm gonna sleep on my bed - which was given by the govt because i basically live in a public boarding school - til my birthday next Wednesday.

We intended to stay back for self training and research but it was raining heavily since morning. It was too cold for us to even stay awake actually. I didnt knew why i didnt join them in their slumber. Maybe it's because i couldn't really warm myself up on the cold tiled floor of our mufaz. Maybe it's because no one else would stay up and made sure no one would steal the laptops we borrowed or the money in our bags. Maybe both.

 It kinda strike me a little bit late than i'm gonna be 15 in less than a week. 15 seems like a really small age and pretty much has a really easy life to endure, but i cant come to acceptance of the fact that i've been breathing for 15 years. Like, wow. That's a pretty good achievement. Some people cant even live to be 5.

 I wonder when will i finally get the hang of doing almost everything excellently. I'm tired of working hard for something just to end up being a huge embarrassment to the nation and the world. Nothing I do ends up the way i wanted. and i hate seeing others doing it all so flawlessly.

 maybe i should work harder......

10:45 PM

Older | Newer
For your perusing


With SPM coming up, Syasya decides to write her journey to the biggest determiner of her life. (notice the brackets in her post counting down the days to the start of it) Turning 17 two days before Bahasa Melayu Paper 1, Syasya is an ambitious girl no taller than 5 foot 3, but with dreams higher than the sky. She spends her free time reading, sleeping, writing and lepaking. Syasya's a little bit weird sometimes, but, well, she likes to be different.

if your heart starts to wonder


Blog | Twitter | Instagram | Ask

Loves
Layout by 16thday
Resources One Two Three


3